Tuesday, October 8, 2013

What is important?

   So here I have been sitting wondering just what is important.  I really want to know.  For awhile now I have not really considered many things to be important.  This sort of arose from my heart surgery a few years ago.  You go through something like that, where you are forced to come face to face with  your own mortality and you don't exactly walk away from that unscathed.  I at least was not able to accomplish such a feat.  I sort of gained the view that there is so little in this life that truly does matter.  I mean at the end of the day when you are escorted across the River Styx by Death himself what will you be taking with yourself?  Your fancy car?  Your extravagant house?  Your bank account with all its gold?  What about your trophies, or your hobbies?  What do you think will be the things he lets you take with you?  I guarantee  you that it won't be anything tangible.  Only the immaterial will you be able to take across that river.  Thus I reasoned, if I die and can take none of this here with me, why then am I wasting my time accumulating all of this?  Why not spend my precious time on that which will have value to me on the other side.
   So from all of that I sort of started to not care about much because in the end I wouldn't get to take any of it with me.  So it was best if I just didn't get attached to anything.  Kinda sad don't you think.  Anyways  since I quit caring about pretty much anything I also lost almost all passion for life.  I just was an empty husk of a human, living from one day to another, without really living at all.  But I have learned better now.  Passion and caring are important in this life.  Maybe I don't have to care about money that much, but it can certainly make my life a lot better and then in turn I can use it to make other peoples lives better.  And this is a very worthy goal that I can and should get invested in.  Is it not a worthy goal then to earn as much money as possible?  Not because I get to take it with me but because the effects of it I can take with me.  Every life I bless and curse is an experience I take with me.  Even though I may not know any of the people I effect, their effection is mine none-the-less.  If I can make another life that much more pleasant, that much more happy, or that much easier then all of my efforts will be enough and not in vain.

Saturday, October 5, 2013

Heavens Reality


Prepare yourself for this is a hefty one.
   What really is the reality of heaven and the afterlife? We are taught that we die, are judged of our works and go on to our mansions of glory. But is that all there is to it? For we know that a life of harp playing is not all there is to it. We can all feel it in our souls, there is more to it than that.
   Take David for example. Do you really and honestly believe David is sentenced to the telestial world for eternities on end for one small series of mistakes? I am talking about eternities. You know that time frame that most people equate with infinity. I have learned differently, an eternity is still finite though the ends of its finiteness may be beyond human grasp. For example, take a law written in heaven in the eternity previous, or if you care for a more palpable term in the day before. We live in this day and the law will extend into tomorrow, or into the next eternity. Following that would not that law be without beginning or end with respect to that eternity? So, is it logical or even fair that multiple lengths of infinity be set for the actions of a mere few moments or days?  Are you trying to tell me that God in His infinite glory, wisdom, power, and love can not find a way to save each and every one of His children? That is sort of preposterous. Yes this is the plan of Happiness.  - That is another blog post for later - But really why can not the great God of the Universe save us all?
   Once we are judged and placed in our kingdoms of glory do you really believe that, that is it? Do you honestly believe that for a simple pronouncement of placement with regards to glory you will suddenly know every single thing knowable? That your eternal progression is only through posterity?  I can not believe that. I know to much to believe that. I am not saying that you have to believe as I do, I am grateful that the gospel permits us to believe differently. For in the words of my dear friend "I shudder each time I hear them say, 'I know this is the only true church'" It simply is not true. This may be the only religion that has the power of the priesthood and also modern revelation, it may be the only church ordained of God here on earth. But it is not the only true church of God. I realize I may be speaking in circles at the moment. But believe me when I say I have seen further and can say this, open your minds to what you have refused and see the reality for what it is. Heaven is more strange than we think and yet it is so similar to this life that it will astound us. I will touch on that one later too. Part of the reason we do not know more about Heaven is that our notions of it are so at variance to the reality of it that even if we saw it with our own two eyes we would refuse to believe it.
   I do not know what it will be like. Not yet at least. Will we if crowned as gods and goddesses begin right away on creating new creations without end or will we then step into a new phase of learning and preparation. For why learn the rules and methods of creation if you will never employ them. That being said I believe that this life is merely in one small sense to prove that we are worthy of the gift of godhood, not that we are ready and prepared for it. That preparation comes later. If heaven is closer to earth than we believe, is there any merit then to this idea? If just as we progress and learn in this life and then progress and learn more in the next life. Why not find additional lives after? Who is to say that there is not a God level 2, level 3 and so forth? The truth is stranger than we can comprehend yet it is so familiar to us that it will surprise us when we learn it.

--- Jeff

Friday, October 4, 2013



   So my father was talking to me the other day. I told him how I felt alone and that no one was there for me. He responded that this life with regards to the gospel is a selfish one. There is only so much that the church leaders and members can do for you. The rest you are on your own to do. Now, while this in theory is true, we all know that theories are only true till disproven. Then the new prevailing theory will hold sway till the next advancement and so forth. I currently do not believe what he told me. I feel that there is a better way, a higher road to be taken. I am not saying I know the path to take, but for me I feel that in standing on his shoulders I have seen a little further. I was never arrogant enough to toss aside what my parents had to say to me, thinking I knew better. I have always considered important what everyone has to say. They all believe what they are saying for a reason and I should find out that reason. I do not have to believe their reasons but I owe it to them and myself and the future people with whom I will come in contact with to comprehend them. By understanding everyone I will be able to effectively see further than anyone and in turn be able to be more helpful to others.
   Now, yes our own individual salvation is a personal matter. But in reality it should not be. There is a reason the church has set up the varying programs that it has. Of classes and activities. We go to those to have fun but also to have the camaraderie and fellowship of one another. To listen to each others triumphs and celebrate in them but to also hear out our complaints and weep together in our failures. I may be stuck on utopian notions but really is there any reason why we are not living them?  Our home and visiting teachers are there for us, or are they? When we enter the waters of baptism we pledge to lift each others burdens and so on and so forth(Mosiah 18:8-9). But how often is someone really there for you when you need them? Rarely. We are always to caught up in our own lives to truly care about another human and the quality of their life and the varying ways in which we can effect it for the better. Zion is about one heart and one mind. Why were there no poor among them? Is it because they were all sharing each others monies? Or was it because the poor in spirit were cared for and nourished by the strong. Or because the they all knew they alone not one person can get back to heaven, not even the Lord himself. He needs us all to get back just as much as we need him. Do not reject that notion as heretical, think on it please. If he had not sacrificed himself and saved us all do you think that he would have been fit to be Lord and regain His rightful Heavenly Throne? Only in saving us and not coveting the flesh did He prove himself worthy to be our Lord and Savior. Zion is a communal effort. We rely on the Lord for his burden is light and easy to bear, and we also rely on each other. For therein we all lifting together each and everyones burden they all become lighter still. I do not struggle with alcohol yet you may, let me carry that burden for you. I can gladly carry that burden for another for decades without tiring. So why shouldn't I?
   Sure we struggle through times of weak faith, or pride inducing wealth, and periods of turmoil.  But if everyone truly cared about another then those issues would evaporate as the morning frost before the mighty sun.  They are all of little consequence and like the frost can not stand but a few seconds in the light of a day full of hours.  The frost never toppled a nation and you are mightier than a nation.   Do not believe me, look to the books. The annuls of time are riddled with the stories of men and women who forged, shaped, and even toppled nations and empires. Maybe our own story is not going to be entered into those books next to those tails. But if they can do it so can you. Yes I must stand on my own two feet but with others next to me I can do it, for I am not alone. The 5 wise virgins in truth could have helped the 5 foolish ones. In Zion there would be a way. Never look to defeat before consulting faith. We must but look for it, and then it will reveal itself to us. It may require a little bit more work. But really what is the worth of a soul? Is not a little bit of work worth it? There really is no reason for us to weather a storm alone. It does not make us stronger. It only teaches us that we are alone. If I walk on those waves of adversity with you am I lessening your growth? No, if anything I am increasing it, for you will through my assistance stand longer and walk further than you could have on your own. And then when I grow tired another would be there to help you keep going. Trials were not meant to passed alone, but communally. The strength and companionship that would arise from such trial sharing would be beyond the dreams of most mortal people. Do not be scared of such things. We will not be asked to carry someone all the time or everyday for a few minutes. The burden will truly be light, we just have to believe it and then act. Or journey to Heaven need to be a solo adventure. It does not need to be confined to just the blood family. It can be so much more.
   Believe that there is a higher road to follow. And then seek after it. I know it is there. It will require more effort, I can assure of that. But I can also promise you that as we all seek the path less trod and rise higher our views will be greater. We will see sweeping vistas that take our breath away and cause us all to whisper in silenced reverence "Wow, this was worth it."

--- Jeff

Thursday, October 3, 2013

A New Leaf

   So, life has been around the sun and back and back around again since I have last posted anything.  I know this may not be read for awhile.  But I will write none-the-less.  I may post images of work done, or simple ruminations, to deep thoughts of the fundamental nature of the heavens and not simply the perceived ones either.
   Today I am writing about inspiration.  I have a very special person in my life.  She has inspired to me to reach far higher than I ever would have dared to reach before.  I thought I was aiming for the stars before, but in talking with her and listening to her dreams and goals I realized that my simple dreams while dreams they still were, were not half as grandiose I had thought them out to be.  I was a mere commoner.  Against her I was nothing, I am nothing.  She is so much smarter and driven than I am.  She is not defeated by life as I am.  She is so much more spontaneous, so much more insightful, detail grasping, and far sighted than I am.  And I used to think myself fairly spontaneous and insightful.  I thought that I was seeing farther than others because of the details that I was seeing and the connections I was making that I was not hearing anyone else make.  Yet despite all that, by her side I am nothing special.
   Yet by her side she has made me so much more.  She has inspired me to reach higher.  I always knew at the bottom of my soul that I had the ability and the power to take the world on and change it, single-handedly if need be.  I was in a rut of to much construction and not enough intellectual banter.  Sure I was thinking to myself and going over things and talking ideas over.  But I never had the exchange with another person.  And that feedback from another, that external view point or critique is invaluable. They logic check your thoughts.  They refine them.  They even add to them.  I now realize that though I was thinking a lot I was slowing down and not thinking as broad anymore.  My social skills had deteriorated detrimentally and I am now paying the price of that.  That is what she has shown me.  I know that I can do and be better.  I know others are better than me.  But I was always alone.  No one ever believed in me and thus inspired me to reach for that almighty goal that was to be mine.  I was the lone driving force and inspiration in my life.
   Thus I say this.  We can all use not just a role model in our lives, those come a dime for a dozen.  But rather we need that inspiration in our lives.  That force that is working beside us and pushing us forward.  Whispering in our ears to try a little longer before we give up.  That force that raises our view a little higher and for once we see the distant horizon in all its grandeur and beauty in place of the dreary steps just before our feet.  That is the inspiration she has been to me.  I have no idea how long she will be a part of my life.  People come and go in life, that is part of what life is.  Some of them touch us to lightly that when the experience is passed we hardly knew that they even touched us.  Yet others touch us so deeply that a scar is etched across our soul.  One that will never be filled till they are back in our lives even if it is on the far side of the veil.  They can be friends, co-workers, lovers, and siblings.  Just open your hearts to the inspiration that others may give you and please try to inspire others for all you are worth.  We are all in this life together and though we may all live it differently and have varying ideals we can all support each other.